I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
