He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
