Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize