What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
