i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize