I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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