If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
