well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
