Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i think i have two assholes
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize