is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
We had to coat check the pizza.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Randomize
