i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
