I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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