Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
