the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
