is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
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