New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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