now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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