I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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