And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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