My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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