What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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