turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
