I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize