It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize