Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
