What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Randomize