evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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