first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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