i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
My vagina just recognized that song.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Randomize
