Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Randomize
