Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
