i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Randomize
