Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize