so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
