I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
