I can text with my tongue
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I'm really busy with my period
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