so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
