Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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