great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
