We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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