I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
