got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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