Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
