Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize