i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
