pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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