He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
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