Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
