please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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