he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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