We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Randomize
